I do not settle !!

The whole concept of settling down really bites me, and it's hitting close to home now more than ever.

I will be graduating in a little bit ( not with a sparkling result, but a good and extremely useful one nonetheless), and my lack of a current stable relationship becomes more obvious than ever, and it's because I choose not to settle for just anyone, but look for and FIND "the one".

Not that I have never been in a relationship ( been dating regularly since I was 15 years old - records prove this), but I have not kept a stable relationship in quite a while (and it's not because of my fictitious and overblown promiscuity), but rather because of the previously mentioned reason.

Growing up, we all had visions of the perfect relationship: Boy meets girl, boy likes girl, girl is crazy in love with boy, boy feels the same about girl, and they date, boy gets a good job, they marry, have kids, boy turns to man, never strays, and girl keeps her body looking like Iman Abdulmajid at 54.

That's kinda out of a romance novel by any author other than Danielle Steele ( things never end well in her books), but the sad truth is that's not how things really go (at least for most people). Rather:

1. Boy meets girl, and is crazy insane, going ape-s**t for her;
2. But girl is having none of it, she's looking for someone more mature (and sees them too - by going to weddings and looking for church brothers);
3. Boy makes a move, girl doesn't see it his way, boy is crushed;
4. Girl dates the supposedly responsible and mature "boy" that is actually a boy in a man's body.

The years role by, boy becomes more "mature" and starts looking to "settle down" after being crushed and also crushing in return. Girl has had her fill of "hit and run" gentlemen and starts to look to "settle down" after the same scenarios pass for her.This is where the real fun starts. The church groups, the blind dates, the wedding ground hunting schemes, the single profile statuses on Social Networking sites etc.

In the interim, a lot of happiness has gone out the window from the actions of both boy and girl - now man and woman ( one more desperate than the other).

If they had sought true happiness, they probably would never need to settle ( PROBABLY, NOT DEFINITELY).

Now back to the top of the story ( the concept of settling down). When we settle, it's out of fear. Oh my God, I'm going to be left out of not having what eveybody else is having - a seemingly complete, yet grossly inadequate life, by most of our personal convictions and definitions.

In recent conversations with friends, we discussed our hopes and dreams for our immediate futures, and a core topic was "THE WEDDING". How they would all love to get married in time ranges from immediately we graduate to 3 years.

But then, to whom? is the question that we ask. To a random target compliant individual (i.e. right age, right height, right profession, right ethnic background etc - ergo the option that comes your way, that you settle for ) or the one that makes you believe that miracles happen because everyday you spend with them is a miracle of birth to you ?

I would rather wait for the merger of eternity to come, pay in full for it and get the eternal benefits of devotion to the ideal of affection and the greatest of friendships, than settle down and have a time-based contract whose benefits dwindle with each passing year.

I do not settle because I do not compromise on my future, and the happiness which it contains. I do not settle because I believe in the existence of true love.